Curiosity, not assumptions, creates the emotional safety survivors need to truly heal.
Dear Colleague,
In our work with survivors of domestic violence and relationship abuse, curiosity is not just a clinical stance—it is a lifeline. When someone has lived through gaslighting, control, or emotional abuse, being truly heard without pressure can feel revolutionary.
Assumptions, even well-intended ones, can unintentionally reinforce the very dynamics a survivor is trying to escape. When we assume a client should leave, disclose, or process more quickly, we risk replicating the pressure they have already endured. Survivors may feel unseen or misunderstood, even in the safest of spaces.
Curiosity offers something different. It says, “I believe you know what’s best for you, and I’m here to support you in finding your way.” This mindset invites survivors to share at their own pace. It honors the survivor’s internal wisdom, especially in the aftermath of trauma bonding or coercive control, where their voice may have been systematically silenced.
By staying curious, we help create a trauma-informed environment where healing is centered on empowerment. Questions like “What feels true for you right now?” or “What do you notice in your body when we talk about this?” can be more powerful than any directive or advice.
Survivor Support starts with curiosity.
Genuine curiosity fosters emotional safety. It models trust and non-judgment after abuse, allowing survivors to slowly rebuild relational confidence. It also helps providers better attune to complex trauma responses, including ambivalence, shutdown, or fear of trusting again.
As clinicians, curiosity is one of our most powerful tools. It deepens connection, promotes autonomy, and helps us walk alongside survivors without an agenda. It reminds us that healing after abuse is not something we lead—it is something we support.
👉 Resource to Support Your Practice: Types of Abuse Worksheet
Use this tool to explore relational harm patterns with clients in a validating, client-led way.
With appreciation for all you do,
Catrina LPCS
#survivor #traumarecovery #relationshipabuse #traumainformedcare #healingjourney #supportsurvivors #domesticviolenceawareness #traumatherapycovery #emotionalsafety #trustafterabuse #relationshipabuse #providercommunity