Believing survivors starts long before we say the words out loud. Dear Colleague, Many of us say we believe survivors, but our actions tell another story. We second-guess timelines, ask for more details, or look for signs that someone is “credible.” These micro-validations communicate that survivors must prove their pain. And they chip away at […]
We Say “Believe Survivors,” But Do We Really? Read More »
Caring deeply is not the same as being equipped to help safely. Dear Colleague, Even the most compassionate provider can cause harm without realizing it. When we rely solely on empathy without examining our approach, we may unintentionally silence or steer survivors. What we think is support can feel like control when it overrides their
Why Good Intentions Cannot Stand Alone in Survivor Support Read More »
Strength is not something we give survivors. It is something we recognize in them. Dear Colleague, Too often, support begins with the assumption that something is wrong. When providers enter the room ready to fix, we reinforce the belief that survivors are damaged. Even gentle guidance can feel like correction when it is not requested.
Survivors Are Not Broken. We Must Stop Treating Them That Way. Read More »
Sometimes the systems we create for safety end up reinforcing control. Dear Colleague, We are taught to protect survivors, but protection can look a lot like power. When we take over a survivor’s safety plan, we may unintentionally mirror the dynamics they are trying to escape. Safety built on control, even benevolent control, can feel
What If Everything We Know About Survivor Safety Is Wrong Read More »
Sometimes even our most encouraging words can leave survivors of abusive relationship feeling unseen. Dear Colleague, Empowerment language can become a burden when survivors are not ready to carry it. Phrases like “you’re so strong” or “you’ve got this” are meant to uplift, but they can land as expectations. Survivors may feel they have to
When Empowered Starts to Feel Like Pressure Read More »
Some days, helping survivors will confront parts of you that you have not healed yet. Dear Colleague, Working with survivors often surfaces your own unprocessed wounds. Even the most seasoned provider can feel caught off guard by an emotional reaction. These reactions may come from past personal trauma, grief, or even early professional burnout. No
The Thing Nobody Tells You About Helping Survivors Read More »
Some of the most dangerous moments in a survivor’s life happen right after they decide to leave. Dear Colleague, Leaving is often the most life threatening decision a survivor can make. Studies show that women are 70 times more likely to be killed in the weeks after leaving than at any other time in the
Survivors Are Dying to Leave. Literally. Read More »
Leaving an abusive relationship isn’t just hard — it can be life-threatening. Dear Colleague, To truly support survivors, we must understand the staggering risks they face when attempting to leave an abusive partner. Leaving isn’t just an emotional decision — it’s a complex, often life-threatening transition that demands our deep respect, validation, and strategic support.
Why Leaving an Abusive Partner Is So Complex — And So Dangerous Read More »
For survivors, trust isn’t just given — it’s rebuilt piece by piece. Dear Colleague, Helping survivors rebuild trust after abuse is one of the most delicate parts of relationship recovery. When we prioritize emotional safety and empowerment, survivors can learn that healthy connection is possible — and they are worthy of it. 👉 Resource to
Trust After Abuse: Helping Survivors Rebuild Safely Read More »
Understanding manipulation tactics is key to helping survivors stay empowered and safe. Dear Colleague, Two concepts every survivor — and provider — needs to understand are gray rocking and bread crumbing. When survivors know what to expect, they can protect their energy, set stronger boundaries, and move forward more confidently. 👉 Resource to Support Your
Gray Rocking and Bread Crumbing: Tools Survivors Need to Know Read More »