Control doesn’t always come with bruises. Sometimes, it comes with silence, fear, and shrinking your truth to survive. Dear Survivor, You may not have called it control at the time. Maybe it looked like jealousy. Or concern. Or the kind of love that just wanted you “safe.” But if you ever felt like you had […]
How Narcissists Use Coercive Control in Relationships Read More »
Many of us never expected that our deepest challenge would be emotional depletion. Dear Colleague, We entered this work to make a difference. And we are. But sometimes, making space for trauma day after day takes more from us than we realize. I’ve spoken with countless providers who describe feeling detached, irritable, or numb after
Compassion Fatigue and the Cost of Caring for Survivors Read More »
Some of the hardest chains to break are the ones we can’t see. Dear Survivor, Trauma bonds don’t feel like abuse at first. They feel like hope: a promise that the love will come back, that the bad days are just a phase, that things will get better if you just try harder. These bonds
Why Survivors Struggle to Leave: The Truth About Trauma Bonds Read More »
Some trauma needs more space to breathe before it can fully heal. Dear Survivor, A survivor I once worked with, who we’ll call Maya, had done years of weekly therapy. She was insightful, committed, and brave, but there was still a heavy weight that clung to her spirit. She told me, “I understand my trauma.
Why I Recommend EMDR Therapy Intensives to Survivors Read More »
You don’t have to be sure of everything to take your next step. You just have to trust yourself enough to try. Dear Survivor, One of the most painful effects of narcissistic abuse is how it breaks your trust in your own perception. You begin to question your memory, your instincts, even your feelings. You’re
From Confusion to Clarity: Rebuilding Trust in Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse Read More »
Sometimes healing feels lonelier than being hurt. Dear Survivor, There’s a quiet grief that doesn’t get talked about enough: the loneliness that shows up after you finally see the truth. At first, awakening to the reality of abuse can feel like relief. The fog lifts. The confusion starts to clear. But then something unexpected happens.
Realizing It’s Abuse: The Loneliness of Waking Up Read More »
What do you do when doing the right thing might put your client at risk? Dear Colleague, Mandated reporting is a legal duty. But for survivors of domestic violence, it can feel like a betrayal. We must walk a careful line, honoring our ethical and professional responsibilities while holding deep awareness of the real-world consequences
When Ethics Meets Danger: Navigating Mandated Reporting with DV Survivors Read More »
Healing from trauma takes time, but what if there were a way to shorten the journey without rushing the process? Dear Survivor, Some survivors spend years in weekly therapy, making brave strides in recovery while still feeling stuck in old trauma loops. I’ve seen it happen often. There’s nothing wrong with the traditional path, but
How EMDR Intensives Help Survivors Heal Faster Read More »
Leaving doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re reclaiming your life, even if it takes more than one try. Dear Survivor, If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why can’t I just leave?”—please know you are not alone. This question carries so much pain, shame, and misunderstanding. But the truth is, leaving a narcissist is one of
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: Why It’s So Hard to Leave a Narcissist Read More »
When control doesn’t stop at the door, it often follows you through your screen. Dear Survivor, A client once told me something that still sits heavy: her partner had secretly placed a tracking device on her car before a weekend trip with a friend. When she confronted him, he said it was for her protection.
They’re Still Watching: Protecting Yourself Digitally Read More »